Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Wanderlust Myself.

Wanderlust. That basically describe how I've felt since I was 13. It basically describes what I would like to do for my career. Now, some of you are repeating the word Wanderlust over and over in your head, and saying what the hell does that mean. Well let me break it down for you so you can stop questioning yourself. Wanderlust is a strong desire for or impulse to wander or travel and explore the world, to discover one's existence. Sounds great doesn't it. Wanderlust. Even the word itself just leaves me feeling hopeful and giddy.

Now I am your average twenty something trying to figure out life. I ramble, I dream, I read, I write. I keep going through each and every day trying to figure out life, trying to figure out myself. Who am I? What do I believe in? What do I want? Well honestly I don't really know. I feel like I change my mind on a daily bases. I feel like that's what your suppose to do though when your young. In your early twenty's and in your teens, your suppose to question everything, your suppose to make mistakes, your suppose to figure out who you are. My problem is at 17 you make one of the most important decisions that shape your future, and I'm sorry but at 17 you know nothing. Now I remember being 17, and I remember thinking I knew EVERYTHING. But boy was I wrong.

How do you decide at such an innocent age, what you want to do with the rest of your life. You have to decide if you want to go to college. Where you want to go to college. If you don't attend college do you move out? Do you live with your parents? Since your not in school what do you do for a full time job? Or my problem, what do you want to major in?

Such important decisions for such young people to make. Even at twenty three I constantly question what I want to do never mind 17. So recently people have been nagging me. You know the real "adults" aka parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, older cousins. Their all on my case. When are you going to graduate college. What do you want to be? What kind of job do you want? Whats your major again? How much longer do you have? How are you going to pay off your student loans? I try to bite my tongue and give them civil yet honest responses. But honestly all of these question started to make me question myself.

Who am I? Well I am on the verge of being twenty four. I am still taking college courses for business at the community college. At the end of this semester I have the maximum number of credits that I can transfer to a four year school. I am a waitress. I am a sister, a daughter, a granddaughter. I am a Boston sports fan. I am addicted to my kindle. I enjoy writing. I love traveling. I have an obsession with bad reality TV. My favorite color is green. I hate when people take advantage of defenseless people, like children or the disabled, or animals. I cry when I watch anything with troops returning home from overseas.  These things I know. These things have never changed. I can define myself by constants like that. But in the long range, what do I want to do for the rest of my life, I struggle.

So recently I started to think about it. I mean really think about it. Because lets face it, I'm not getting any younger and I need to make a move now. So I got to thinking. I am studying business because its a degree which you can use for a number a jobs. But I really don't enjoy it. If I had my way I would major in Writing or English or Forensics or Psychology. Those types of things are what interest me. But realistically those degrees don't translate well in the job world. There aren't that many jobs that I could get with those degrees. So Instead I thought what else do I like. Well I like to talk. I like to party. I thought of being an event planner. Or working in a hotel or a casino. These are jobs that I think would hold my interest and that I would also enjoy. But really I would love to write and travel. So I thought how could I ever find a job and do both. Is writing travel reviews a job? I looked it up and it is. Its a hard industry to break into, but it is indeed a job.

So I at least figured out that I'm going to get my degree in Business Hospitality and Tourism Management. I at least feel like I figured out another part of myself. I thought back over the year about experiences that I really matured and learned about myself as. And my trip to London and Paris was very eye opening in educational. I adored it. I don't think I have ever felt so alive. I have always wanted to visit the places we learn about in history class. Visit the places you see in the movies. Lay on those sandy beaches you see in the commercials. Ever since I was in middle school I wanted to explore. Wanderlust.

If I could get a job and travel I think I would be in love. Even if I worked on a cruise ship or at a resort. Seeing different cultures. Experiencing new things. This is what makes me happy. This is where I thrive. The only problem with this is how do I gain experience? People keep telling me to travel while your young. How? Travel cost money. I am a broke college student. I would love to travel and then write about it here int his blog, in hopes that one day someone will read it and a job will come of it. Wanderlust.

Eh so many things in the life of a twenty something just trying to figure out life. I know I didn't even mention books in this post that I've read. But I really just needed to ramble and vent about life. So thus the post above.

No comments:

Post a Comment